Like a magnet, I feel the Lord drawing me closer and closer to Him. It’s a force that defies description. It has no physical qualities that can be painted or sculpted. The only thing I can compare it to is the gravitational pull I felt when I fell in love for the first time.
Instead of finding a way to squeeze in some quality time with the Lord, I now build my other activities around my time with Him. All other tasks now take a back seat to reading His letters, speaking to Him, listening to Him, and getting to know Him. Since committing myself to reading and writing about the Scriptures every day this year, I find myself completely engrossed.
I remember feeling that way when I experienced young love. It was overwhelming, yet defied description. I didn’t have the words because I had never felt it before. When I wasn’t with him, I thought of him. His face was the first face I wanted to see every day after getting off of the school bus. His voice was the last thing I wanted to hear at night when I drifted off to sleep with the phone up to my ear. The more I knew about him, the more I wanted to know.
I felt joy and safety in his presence. There was no place I’d rather be than with him. And, the more time that passed, the closer we became. I loved him more and more each day. He was my first and only love. And, if we had not gotten married and raised a family together, I’d still think of him to this day. You never forget your first love.
Thankfully, I didn’t have to because I’ve fallen in love with him many times over the last 35 years that we’ve been together. As much as I love that man, I love the Lord even more. Nothing and no one comes before my God.
Day 54 - Deuteronomy chapters 4-6 and Psalms 54
In today’s chapters, Moses reiterated the Ten Commandments to his people just before sending them off into the Promised Land without him. First among them was,
I read a comment once by an atheist who asked what kind of God would have such a human emotion as jealousy. Perhaps this word “jealous” is used so that our limited understanding can grasp the meaning. Maybe it’s expressed this way so that we can relate to God’s feelings of betrayal when those He loves turn their attention elsewhere.
We are all very familiar with the importance of trust in human relationships. When we love deeply – spouses, friends, girl/boyfriends, children, even parents – we require their loyalty. We expect that the love we give will be reciprocated. And, when it’s not, we're prone to becoming angry and jealous, just like God.
I don’t believe jealousy and anger are just human emotions. I think the atheist had it backwards. God created us in His image. Therefore, the emotions that we feel come from Him. 1 John 4:8 says,
We love because God loves. We put our hearts on the line in hopes that our loved ones will do right by us...because that’s what God does. We become hurt and angry, even jealous, when those we love are unloving and unfaithful towards us...because that’s how God feels.
When God breathed life into Adam, He didn’t just give him oxygen to fill his lungs. He gave Adam a spirit, one that resembled His own, with the full range of emotions that we all feel today. When God said that it's not good for man to be alone, He gave him Eve, someone to love and who would love him back.
I believe this perfectly represents what God was feeling in His own Spirit. He didn't like being alone, and I believe that's why He created us all. To give and receive love. So it makes perfect sense to me that God would be jealous when, after all that He's done, His creation ignores or denies Him.
I can relate to this as a parent, as well as a wife. As much as I love my family, of course there have been times when I felt anger and jealousy. Experiencing feelings like this, as deeply as I have, helps me to accept and appreciate the Lord even more. And, I always want Him to know that I’ll forever be His faithful daughter. In love.
Have you ever experienced jealousy? Feel free to comment below, or by visiting my Facebook page.
*Join my one-year trip around the world of Scripture. You’re invited to take this journey with me, as I meditate on God’s Word day and night. Each morning, you’ll find a post on my Facebook page encouraging my new #Biblebuddies along the way. And each night, I’ll be writing my impressions right here at listen2leslie.com. I’d love it if you’d share your comments, to spark some fruitful discussion. The only passport you’ll need for this journey is the Read Scripture app which provides us with our daily itinerary. You’ll love this app because it contains videos by The Bible Project that serve as our tour guide. Traveling is so much better when you have someone to share the experience with, so please join me, will you?
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